Well, this week, I was really in for a treat, when I opened it to read the oddest, yet totally sincere, review of a rock concert imaginable. The author is 47 year old Larry Crossett, who lives and writes in Mason City. Despite how this review sounds, he is not a being from another planet.
This wasn't a rock concert, my friends, it was a nap. Or a long wait in the lobby at your doctor's office. Any concert that begins with a prayer is not a rock concert. I'm sorry. It just isn't.
Life doesn't get old. People do, but life doesn't. It always has something new to offer. In the last few years I've changed careers; I've learned to ice skate; I've taken up golf and then dropped it again . . . . And just this week, Amy and I went to our first ever rock concert.
The group we went to see is called Point of Grace. This band is very popular on the radio station my wife listens to, so they must be the real deal. They were performing at the University of Illinois at Springfield in order to raise funds for Contact Ministries, a charitable organization. A friend with connections got us a pair of tickets.
I was a little worried, going in. I'd heard that the volume at rock concerts sometimes exceeds the recommended 85 decibels for safety. Also, that some of the lyrics are impolite, and people don't always turn off their cell phones during the performance. I'm bothered by discourteousness.
I needn't have worried, though. The evening's program opened with a word of prayer; the musicians talked about their families between gentle songs played at a reasonable volume; and everyone sat and listened respectfully. Ushers were on hand in case anyone tried to bring an unauthorized drink into the auditorium.
See you shouldn't be afraid to try something new. You might like it.
3 comments:
Completely agreed that this was not a rock concert or anything even close. It kind of sounds like one of those mega churches with the jumbotron. For some reason I keep comparing the experience written about here to Lallapalooza. Quite a juxtaposition.
But this article makes me so very, very curious about the rest of this person's life. I wonder if he is too afraid to eat the green M & M's because someone told him they will make him horny.
Aubrey, John,
I disagree. I can remember being at a Ministry concert when Al Jourgensen refused to play another note until everyone said "God bless you" to a fellow in the mosh pit who had sneezed.
I also heard that Ozzie Osbourne would always quietly say grace before biting into a bat.
You see, rock and roll is much more civilized and respectful than you might imagine. Larry should feel right at home at any concert, even a Marilyn Manson show, where the devil-worshipping, blood-drinking singer always playfully says "Just kidding!" after each show.
Hells Bells and God Bless,
Dan
> Larry should feel right at home at any concert, even a Marilyn Manson show, where the devil-worshipping, blood-drinking singer always playfully says "Just kidding!" after each show.
Larry also surely would have enjoyed the presidential-assassination bit Manson used to do at his concerts, as well as his glittering marquee sign reading "DRUGS." It's always great when Onion-style writing makes its way into actual papers.
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